Do you know people that get caught up in perception?

It is way too easy to get caught up in what we are told and ignore reality. There are several documentaries on how the news cherry picks stories to create a perception that things are worse then they actually are in an effort to keep us watching. Advertising creates a perception that if we use their product we will solve our problems.

Here is a real life example of how advertising and the media drives our perception that we have to purchase more to make people like us. A couple of years ago I was working with a young man who was out of work because of medical problems. It was just before Christmas and he was looking for ways to make money because he wanted his 2 year old son to have a great Christmas. He said I only have about one hundred dollars for the holiday and I won't be able to give my son a Christmas and purchase things for the family as well. He was looking for fast cash in direct sales to make it happen.

Before he received his first check Christmas would be over but it was clear he did not want to be in this position again. Before we spoke about the business I provided a few words of wisdom in the hope of relieving some of the stress he was feeling. I said "First before we get into the business lets talk about Christmas. Your son is two and he does not care about expensive gifts he cares about you and being with you on the holiday and that is all that matters. I understand that you want to give him a holiday but when he is 10 he is not going to remember that you bought him an expensive toy. A two year old boy wants cars and action figures. You can take that 100 dollars and buy him 50 little cars and a nice gift and he will be just as happy as if you had spent 10 times that much. In fact if you over do it he will probably get bored opening presents and want to play with the 1 dollar cars you bought. As far as the adults in your family I would hope that they would understand that you are unemployed right now and would not expect you to deny your son a Christmas and purchase things for them."

He listened to me and bought his son a number of small gifts most that were $5 or less. He and his son had a great holiday together and as expected he grabbed the $1 cars and played with them for hours. I remembered this story because I just visited with the young man, who is still with the business, and his son who is now 5. We were visiting and he grabbed a few of these small plastic cars and brought them to the table to be part of the group and he was rolling these around the table while we spoke. Even though he now has rows of DVD's and plenty of other toys he still enjoys playing with small cars, between playing with the more expensive toys his father can now afford.

Why did he feel he had to spend hundreds on a 2 year old child? Easy, the perception that a good parent purchases these expensive toys for their children which is pounded into us and our children through advertising. Months before Christmas children's TV is loaded with commercials of children receiving these toys and the result is they become very happy right before your eyes. Maybe it is just a big smile or their parents getting a hug but the message is very clear. Big gift equals happy child.

How is perception driving other areas of our life? Fear that some stranger is waiting to break into our home, steal all of our money, or kidnap our children. Fear that everything we eat or do is bad for us. If you step back and look at the media you see news that makes everything bad and products that makes all those bad things better.

It is difficult not to get caught up in perception because the material presented plays on our deepest emotions, fear and pleasure. The only personal defense we have is through education. I constantly remind my children that the media only presents a piece of the story, which is probably not what actually happened, and they are only showing the worst side of humanity. They have to be more conscious of what is going on around them now then in fear of what is going on someplace else in the world.

Terrible things happen sometimes and there is no law, agency, or person that can change that or protect us from that. We can't stop living and achieving our dreams because of fear or humanity itself will fail to exist.